Before Reading

It’s Normal To Have Feelings of Loneliness

It’s common for people to feel lonely. It’s common to feel alone. As the author (Kamal here), I’ve struggled with this myself.

Whether you’ve just moved to Buffalo or been a long-time resident, feeling lonely is normal. It takes time to build a community for yourself and join the communities of others. Finding people who are there for you takes effort. Sometimes it’s not the easiest, but it’s possible.

If you are struggling with feelings of loneliness, a therapist may help you deal with those feelings.

It’s Hard To Make Friends

Making friends as an adult is difficult. It was already hard in school, but it’s even more difficult when you leave an environment where you see the same people every day.

If you just recently moved to Buffalo, it can be even harder! Please know that it gets easier with time. Slowly but surely, you’ll rebuild your social life, and your new friends will introduce you to more friends.

How To Meet People in Buffalo

Volunteering

In my experience, volunteering is the best way to make friends when you’re feeling alone. It feels good to do and feels even better when you’re working on something you care about with other people who also care about the cause.

Buffalo has the most charitable organizations out of any city in the USA! There are LOTS of people here who would take your help to further their cause and be your friend along the way.

Do you love dogs? Volunteer at the local animal shelter and you’ll meet other people who also love dogs.

And if you can’t find a charity or non-profit that has a cause that is aligned with a social interest of yours, volunteer for organizations that just do great work for the community! Food banks and food pantries are always a great choice. Women and homeless shelters are always great.

Community-building organizations are always wonderful as well. These are organizations full of people who look to innovate to create a better future for Buffalo. Many of which are volunteer-run.

If you’re looking for places to volunteer, a quick Google search of “Volunteering in Buffalo” will come up with lots of options. Step Out Buffalo wrote a great list here.

Author’s Favorite Non-Profits to Volunteer For

• BootSector
  • This is an organization that is all about supporting the local Startup and Entrepreneurship community
  • In my experience, they are always welcoming and working on interesting projects. A great way to network and build your resume while improving your community 
• The Tool Library
  • This is an organization that functions like a normal library, but instead of loaning books, they loan tools
  • In my experience, they are extremely welcoming and accepting of others and the feeling you’ll get by helping here is second to none. A great way to meet others who want to make friends and do good
• Buffalo Olmsted Parks Conservancy
  • This is an organization that takes care of the parks system in Buffalo
  • In my experience, they are always welcoming and accepting of others. They keep our parks operational which is a huge job so the people who come are passionate about building a connection with those who volunteer
• VIA (Visually Impaired Advancement)
  • This is an organization that helps people who are visually impaired learn marketable skills to then obtain a job
  • In my experience, they are always welcoming and accepting of others. Much of the staff is visually impaired along with staff members who have normal sight. It’s a great way to experience working with a diverse team and deeply impacting the lives of others

Events

A great way to meet like-minded people is going to events where you have common interests. There could be board game meetups or trivia nights at bars or birdwatching events. If you’re interested in the topic, it’s easier to strike up a conversation with someone about a common interest that you’re all going to the event for.

Places to find events:

• Meetup.com
  • Registry for meetup groups for all sorts of things/hobbies/interests
• Eventbrite
  • Registry for events that people are hosting and letting people register through Eventbrite
• Facebook Groups
  • Community groups that you are able to join that are about specific interests
• Step Out Buffalo
  • A local organization that keeps track of different things to do and events going on in the City
• r/Buffalo
  • Members of the Buffalo Subreddit will often talk about events going on in the community

Community Groups

There are lots of community groups that meet up on a regular basis around a common interest. Many of these groups have events and get-togethers that are free to attend. There are too many to list but if you search “Meetup for ____ in Buffalo” on Google, something will likely come up.

Some Examples:

• Buffalo Startup Coffee
  • Every Tuesday morning people interested in Startups and Entrepreneurship get together and network
• Buffalo Game Space
  • A group interested in video games and video game development
• Slow Roll Buffalo
  • A group that bikes through the city on Monday nights
• Buffalo Chess Meetup Group
  • A group that loves chess and playing together
• The Knitting Guild of Greater Buffalo
  • A group that loves the art of Knitting
• Indian Association of Buffalo
  • A group of people from the Country of India

Networking Events

Are you a professional in Buffalo? Networking is always valuable from the perspective of moving your career forward (you never know what opportunity will open because of who you met) but also a great way to consistently meet friends.

Once you go to many networking events, you’ll find that many of them have the same people go all the time. This is because it’s where those people see their friends and catch up!

Guess what, you can do that too.

While meeting people and expanding your network, you may meet someone who also works in banking and has an interest in tennis. Invite them to play tennis sometime! It’s likely that the other person wants the exact same thing, a great friend.

Networking events can be intimidating but I promise, everyone there is just as scared to talk to strangers as you are.

Apps

• Dating Apps that have friend-finding features
  • For example, Bumble is mainly known as a dating app but also has a section for making friends

Learning

A great way to build a connection with an individual is by learning something from them. For example, you’ll probably get pretty close to your guitar teacher if you’re spending 60 minutes with them every week. Sure, this is paying for someone’s time. But, it’s building a connection with someone around a shared interest.

And who knows, maybe by taking lessons, you might meet other students and start a band and create some lifelong friends.

Reaching out to old friends

If you did move from another city to Buffalo and are feeling lonely because you haven’t made a group of friends here yet, it may be a good idea to reach out to your friends from back home. I’m sure they’d love to hear from you!

They might even be up for having virtual meals over Zoom with you. Maybe even a regularly scheduled game night over Zoom.

Lots of people feel lonely, even if they don’t look like it from the outside. People will always appreciate if you’re the first one to reach out.